Whatever You Do, Avoid These 5 Openings to Your Recruiting Messages

There are certain phrases and approaches that turn off most prospects when you're trying to communicate in emails, letters or text messaging. Stop doing them, please.

The point of the writer, marketing guru Seth Godin, is simple but vitally important:

In a world that is looking for simplicity, directness and leadership, we naturally (as coaches, recruiters, and people) take way too much time to actually get to the point and draw our listener or reader into the conversation. We assume, because we’ve experienced the alternative over and over again as adults, that we’re supposed to offer up a polite introduction. We need to give our opening statement. We need to set the table before we get to the eating-of-the-meal part.

Actually, the opposite is true.

We just need to start a thought or conversation (or a recruiting message) by saying what we came to say. In recruiting, it’s especially important if the goal we have is to draw in our recruit, and engage them immediately with the story we’re trying to get them to buy into. Long, wordy messages (email and printed letter) usually end up hurting that goal.

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Want some examples? Here are five common things we see college coaches doing in their written communication, all in a sincere effort to be polite and professional, that actually end up hurting their chances of connecting with recruits they are eyeing for their program:

1. “I’m just writing to check in…”

Of all the bland, passive-aggressive statements you could make, this one is numero uno.

Again, it’s not that you aren’t trying to be professional as well as not pressuring the prospect, but at the same time your prospect knows why you’re writing them or texting them this: You want to know 1) are you still interested in us (pressure), and 2) when are you finally going to be ready to commit??? (pressure).

If they know what you’re really trying to say as they read between the lines, maybe we should just be direct and to-the-point instead of sending them on a search between the lines.

2. “My name is _____, and I’m the coach at _______.”

In fairness, I completely understand why coaches would feel it was smart to start a message like this, especially if it was a prospect you had not contacted before. New prospects, for example…on the surface, this seems like the basic and polite thing to do: Introduce yourself, and let them know where you coach.

The problem is, it sounds too ‘mass mail’. It also sounds like you’re assuming they shouldn’t know who you are. Would <insert name of a big time coach in your sport here> start a message with this type of opening? You know the answer to that. So, why should you?

They can see your name at the bottom of the message, and will see the school name in the body of the text or at the bottom (or maybe in your subject line). Make them